A name for my entry...

Things have been going great. I have a renewed hope that Maxwell is making progress. Maybe that is because he is. It is easy to get discouraged sometimes, especially when people try to tell me that Maxwell will need the feeding tube put back in, something I do not plan on. I got really discouraged after the early intervention program brought a nutritionist to our home to show me some new things and give me some suggestions and ideas of things I may not have tried. She didn't seem impressed with my idea toward keeping Maxwell off of the feeding tube. I was unable to get through to her the negativity it had on Maxwell and how it prevented him from being active and happy, let alone he didn't really gain anything. I feel a battle may ensue with this. I hope not, but it is too soon to tell. I am not sure how much this new lady is determined to make me do the feeding tube or if she is just willing to help me find ways to improve Maxwell's eating so that he will be able to grow.

Usually I feel pretty good after a meeting with early intervention people but this one left me wondering if I was doing the right thing or not. It seems that no matter what I do it will all hurt Maxwell in some way or the other. It is just a matter of finding the one that will hurt him the least. So, I became discouraged. I was discouraged enough that Sam noticed and took Friday morning off of work to help me around the house and help cheer me up, which it did. It also helped me to clear my mind and spend some extra time with Maxwell.

I must say that this weekend has offered enough proof to me that Maxwell is indeed progressing and I should continue on the course I am on with him. I think Heavenly Father felt it enough to help me see these things and see that I am doing good and not hurting him.

This weekend Maxwell sat up for a long period of time without assistance. That isn't to say that he can always do it, but he can do it. He can sit for even longer holding on to a toy for support. This is more than good and it shows he is gaining strength. Maxwell can eat now without putting up much of a fight. Of course, since he is teething his hand is in his mouth the whole time and he gets extra messy, but he is doing it without gagging and without crying. If he is given a tube he could lose that along with the sitting. Also, I got to see how Maxwell is gaining in the intelligent department. As I was playing with a toy ring and had it in my mouth he took it out and put it back in my mouth. He can do this over and over again. This is a huge accomplishment for him and although it might not mean something to the average person, it means a lot to me and shows a lot for him.

So, I think Heavenly Father showed me what I needed to see to help reassure me that a feeding tube is not the way to go, that Maxwell is making progress, and that I shouldn't get discouraged.